Oh Look, a Whale!

I put off the swimming part of my training for as long as possible because, well, reasons.  Reasons like although I used to frequent beaches and pools in my younger days, these days I feel too fat to get into a bathing suit.  My policy for the past two decades has been to only put on a swimsuit and go out in public when I am not in the Continental U.S. Another reason is that I’m also nervous about not doing it right.  My logic is this: if I start to practice, and I’m doing it horribly wrong, I’ve wasted time and learned bad habits.  

Unfortunately, you can’t really participate in a triathlon unless you swim. They integrate that into tri training as well, and my Day of Reckoning was a Saturday in February, at 6:00 am. But that’s getting ahead of myself.  Back in December, when I first signed up for this ridiculous triathlon, I knew I would need a suit for training swims.  I jumped onto Amazon.com with a Christmas gift card and bought goggles, a Speedo (not this kind) 

and a swim snorkel.  I thought this last thing might help me focus on strokes instead of struggling to breathe. Then I find out that I will look like an idiot if I use it, so I’m probably going to just ignore the thing for a while. I tried on the suit, and it did fit, although it is not the least bit flattering.

Did I mention that a leading brand of triathlon gear is called “Orca?” Why would anyone encourage comparisons to a whale?

So on a cold pitch-black Saturday morning I head down to the Y.  I’d cased the joint the day before to get the layout down and decrease my nervousness a bit.  That did help, and as we got started, I slid confidently into the pool.  And... that was the last time I’d feel confident that day. Guess whose swim style is horribly wrong?

I have spent most of my adult life trying to keep my butt low and off the radar.  Turns out in swimming that’s a bad thing.  Low butts create drag. Also, I crane my neck up when I want to breath (because it’s the only way I don’t end up with a mouthful of water instead of lungs full of air) which causes my butt to drop even lower. There were a few moments of “kinda graceful,” like my kickoffs, but mostly I was gasping and s l o w.  The coach tried to be encouraging, but he’s young and handsome and has this whole swimming thing figured out.  We used kick-boards for a while, and while my teammates churned down the lanes I did not move at all. Seriously. I’d compare myself to a turtle, but the kind that swim are actually pretty fast.

Anyway, I toughed it out and before I left I grabbed a flyer for private lessons.  I think that’s my best option at this point.  To be honest, I did have fun, even while I was failing.  I love the water, and I want swimming to be something I  don’t suck at. Speaking of, this is my motivational poster of the week: